IN LOCAL SMURF:

Yohan and Pee Wee presented with the Medels of Smurfy Valor. Yohan and Pee Wee, the Smurf Village's friends and protectors were handed the key to the Smurf Village today by Papa Smurf. Painter Smurf also unveiled his new masterpiece "The Squires," a stirring Baroque style painting smurfed by the resident artist of the village. Also at the ceremonies, Poet Smurf read his latest poem for the two heros.

Lo do I see my fair human companions
Smurfy as can be,
I don't even reach their knee
Pee-wee is the wild one, first to the fight
then Yohan will jump in and make it all right
One thing you can always count on with these
Heros on your side
No Smurf ever need to be afraid
And run away

HEADLINE

RALLY PLANNED AGAINST NEW SMURF POPULATION CONTROLS

CLONING DEBATE SMURFS ON

OPINIONATED SMURF

ENTERSMURFMENT

SMURFY PERSONALS

BACK TO FUNKED
Yohan was seen as having tears in his eyes as poet read the beat style poetry to the tune of Harmony Smurf's smurfing Jazz trumpet solo. Following a brilliant address in their honor by Papa Smurf, he bestowed upon them the Medals of Smurfy Valor. Of the two heros, Papa Smurf said, "We all owe you our gratitude, our debt, and our smurf. May you live many strong years and continue to serve us as your loyal allies." The following festivites were marred, however, by Pee Wee consuming too much smurfberry chablis and accidently toppling over in the main tent and wrecking it. Although mainly minor injuries were reported due to Pee Wee's drunked collapse, only one Smurf was injured.
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OPINION COLUMN
BIG MOUTH: FRIEND OR FOE?
By Greedy Smurf

I for one am outraged about smurf I am getting in Smurf Village. Have we all gone out of our smurfs? Every smurf I talk to seems to think that Big Mouth is our enemy. Oh sure, he has inadvertantly smurfed a mushroom or two, but for the most part, he has pulled our smurfs out of the frying pan more than often. Let's face it. Big Mouth is an ogre. He doesn't hate us, he just doesn't really know us Smurfs are here. He has never to my knowledge flat out attacked any of us. From what I've seen, the person Big Mouth does notice and doesn't like is Gargamel, and you all know what his plans are for us. I have cooked for Big Mouth before. When you get smurf-on-ogre with him, he is a fairly decent chap; as smurfy as can be. He did eat about 4500 smurf-berry tarts. The problem with ogres is that ogres have short memories. Sometimes during our conversation, he would forget who I am and forget who in the smurf his own self was and just fall asleep for no reason. It was then I chose to leave, because he might forget I'm a smurf and eat me instead! But, that is because he is an Ogre. Ogres do what ogres do. According to the Crocodile Hunter Smurf, even though he is dangerous, that is just because we are in his area. He's a wild animal, a slightly smarter wild animal, but wild nonetheless. He is to be appreciated for what he is, and not persecuted for what he does. If we can find a way to domesticate him, he might be an even smurfy anti-Gargamel weapon than smurf-gas and smurfapaults. In this Smurf's humble and smurfy opinion, any Ogre that likes my cooking and wants to lay the smurf-down on Gargamel is all right in my book.